Sometimes in order to be successful, you need to redefine what success means to you. Had you told me a year ago that I would be considering running a Prelim level event, I would have told you to up your medication because you were crazy.
In February, we jumped our first XC jumps together. Bec sent me out to jump some BN level jumps and I thought I was going to vomit. At the show in April, I almost quit before starting. In May, I spent two days after looking at the course and dreading the sunken road. In June, I stressed over hills, drops, and tables at a place we had never been. In August, the nerves hit me moments before starting cross country. In September, Kiva fell asleep in the start box and we tackled some tough questions mostly gracefully. I didn't feel like I was going to vomit when I got done.
And here we are, preparing to take the plunge onto the Prelim track at Woodside in two weeks.
Kiva and I finished qualifying for Prelim last weekend. Looking back at our show record, I realized that we have brought home a 3rd, 2nd, and most recently, a 1st at Training Level out of four that we have completed (we would have placed on the other one but silly me can't read a watch properly). While I don't put much stock in placings (although winning is always much better than losing), we met my other goals which were to show at three different facilities, one of which we've never schooled. We also scored lower than a 30 in two of our dressage tests. I find that absolutely amazing since a year ago she didn't know how to walk without jigging and couldn't pick up the canter without a lot of extra commentary.
Is it terrifying to think we can continue down this eventing path? Absolutely. But somehow it feels like we've been training for this for our whole lives. As Molly said best: The eventing life chose you.
As the internet memes say: If your dreams don't scare you, then they're not big enough.